From "A Hard Days Night"

John ~ "We know how to behave. We've had lessons."

Reporter ~ "What do you call that hairstyle you're wearing?"
George ~ "Arthur."

Reporter ~ "How did you find America?"
John ~ "Turn left at Greenland."

Paul ~ "Of course he can talk. He's a human being, isn't he?"

Ringo ~ "Well if he's your grandfather, who knows?"

All ~ "Hey mister, can we have our ball back?"

Ringo ~ "That old man doesn't like me, it's because I'm small."

George ~ "You have an inferiority complex."

Ringo ~ "That's why I play the drums. To compensate."

John ~ "Betcha can't guess what I was in for!"

Man in train compartment ~ "I fought the war for your sort."
Ringo ~ "Bet you're sorry you won!"

Reporter ~ "Do you often see your father?"
Paul ~ "No actually, we're just good friends."

George ~ "He's very fussy about his drums. They loom large in his legend."

John ~ "You couldn't get a pen in your foot, you swine!"

Norm ~ "It'll be wine, woman and song all the way with Ringo, once he gets a taste for it."

Paul's Grandfather ~ "So far I've been in a car and a room and a train and a room and a room and a room."

John ~ "We seem to have become a limited company."

George ~ "Look at that sweater. I bet his wife knitted it for him."
John ~ "She probably knitted him."

Geroge ~ "Sorry we hurt your field, mister."

Paul ~ "Oh too too sorry flesh would melt...ZAP!!"

Paul ~ "He's probably into some kind of orgy by now."
John ~ "orgy? orgy!"

Grandfather ~ "I was only trying to encourage little Ringo to enjoy himself."

Ringo ~ "Do i snore, John?
John ~ "Yeah, you're a window rattler, son."

Grandfather ~ "My opinion of you is you're all a bunch of sissies!"

George ~ "Torpedoed again, eh?"

John ~ "What are you messing around with that boat for? Come on there's a car waiting!"

Paul ~ "Ah, well they don't take kindly to insults!"

Paul ~ "Ah look, it's the girls!"

All ~ "Who's that little old man?!"

John ~ "You're a swine, ain't he, George?"
George ~ "Yeah, a swine."

John ~ "Why don't we just the show right here? Yeah!"

John ~ "She's going to show me her stamp collection."

Paul ~ "Oh, it's a laugh a line with Lennon!"

Norm ~ "Put them girls down, Lennon!"

Ringo ~ "I'm going paradin'!"

Grandpa ~ "You'd think I haven't noticed!"

Ringo ~ "You want to stop twistin your face? It makes you look scornful."

John ~ "Here he is, the middle aged boy wonder."

Paul ~ "Oh, well, we were looking for Ringo and we realized he must have come back here."

Grandpa ~ "Our nation once again, our nation once agian!"

George ~ "Hey Shake, where's me boot? And get us some tea while your at it."

Norm: ~ "There's only on thing I'm going to say to you, John Lennon. You're a swine!"

Ringo ~ "I'm a drummer, not a wetnurse, you know."

John ~ "Give us a Kiss."

From "Help!"

Paul ~ "I'm all sticky - You're all red!"

Ringo ~ "They have to paint me red before they chop me. It's a different religion from ours...I think."

John ~ "So it famous is!"

George ~ "That's all gab, disemboweling"

John ~ "Why didn't ya think of that ya twit?"

Ringo ~ "I thought she was a sandwich, till she went spare on me hand."

Ringo ~ "What was it that first attracted you to me?"
John ~ "Well, you're very polite aren't you?"

John ~ "You're a failure jewler."

John ~ "You're a failure scientist."

Ringo ~ "The firebrigade got me head out of some railings once."
John ~ "Did you want them to?"
Ringo ~ "No, i used to leave it there when I wasn't using it for school. You can see a lot of the world from railings."

John ~ " No one knows we're here but Paul and me."
George ~ "I know we're here.

John ~ "Get me the home office! He's wrecking my home!"

Inspector ~ "Good Lord, it's Roger, the famous Bengal tiger that escaped from the famous London Zoo this morning!"

George ~ "I didn't encourage that wink. It used to be you, didn't it Paul?"

Paul ~ "Say no more."
Ahme~ "I can say no more."

Ahme ~ "And at the end of the day...slaughtered! Jolly, with a knife."

Swimmer ~ "White Cliffs of Dover?"

John ~ "I wouldn't touch you with a plastic one."

John ~ "Oh, chop it off, Ringo!"
Ringo ~ "I've had some pretty good times with this finger."

John ~ "Doesn't all the blood rush to your head?"

John ~ "What's this?
Ringo ~ "It's a season ticket."
John ~ "Oh good, I like a lot of seasoning in me soup."

John ~ "Quit trying to drag things down to your own level. It's immature, son."

Ringo ~ "I like operations. They give you a sense of outlook."

John ~ "What are you doing?"
Ringo ~ "Posting a letter."

John ~ "How do you feel?"
Ringo ~ "I used to use my hands"
John ~ "He used to use his hands."

George ~ "It's a fiendish thingy! Run Ringo!"

Ringo ~ "We need protection! We have a record to do tomorrow! I need protection!"

Ringo ~ "Come on John, get up! Come on Johnny, get up! Work with me baby, come on!"

Paul ~ "Cop this, one hand!"
George ~ "Hey, what's that whirly thing coming through his stomach?"

George ~ "Bad Machine!"

George ~ "We are going for a friendly walk with the police down by the river."

John ~ "Is there a cure for nail biting?"
Paul ~ "Oh yes, oh yes."
George ~ "Sorry Ringo!"

George ~ "Thanks for the lift, sailor!"

Paul ~ "Doesn't the blood rush to your stomach?"

From "Magical Mystery Tour"

John ~ "I am the walrus!"

Ringo ~ "Will you stop that sitting 'round?"

John ~ "Whoops George, George ,George"

From "Yellow Submarine"

George ~ "Let me peruse it!"

From The Beatles Cartoons

John ~ "I suggest you take a flying leap for yourself."

Paul ~ "You there Susan and you too Adam, if you don't know the words just sing 'Yeah, Yeah,Yeah' but with gusto!"

From Press Confrences

Reporter ~ "Can you sing for us?"
All ~ "NO!"
John ~ " We need money first."

Reporter ~ "What have you seen that you like best about our country?"
John ~ "You."

Reporter ~ "Ringo, why do you wear two rings on each hand?"
Ringo ~ "Cause I can't fit them through my nose."

Reporter ~ "You and the snow came to Washington at the same time today. Wich do you think will have the greater impact?"
Ringo ~ "The snow. We're going tomorrow."

Reporter ~ "What do you think of the American girls, as opposed to the British girls?"
George ~ "They're the same, only they speak with an accent."

Reporter ~ "Are you concerned with the rumor going around that the Rolling Stones are now more important than the Beatles?"
Paul ~ "It doesn't worry us."
John ~ "Cause we manage them."

Reporter~ "What do you think of Beethoven?"
Ringo ~ "I love him, especially his poems."

Reporter ~ "What do you think your music does for these people?"
Ringo ~ "Well, it pleases them, I think. It must because they're buying it."
Reporter ~ "Why does it excite them so much?"
Paul ~ "We don't know really."
John ~ "If we knew, we'd form another group and be managers."

Reporter ~ "What do you think of the campaign in Detroit to stamp out the Beatles?"
Paul ~ "We've got a campaign of our own to stamp out Detroit."

Reporter ~ "Do you hope to take anything home with you?"
George ~ "Rockefeller Center."

Reporter ~ "Why do you think you're so popular all of the sudden?"
John ~ "I don't know, it must be the weather."

Reporter ~ "What do you do when you're cooped up in hotel rooms between shows?"
George ~ "We ice skate."

Reporter ~ "The French have not yet made up their minds about the Beatles. What do you think of them?"
All ~ "Oh, we like the Beatles. They're gear."

Announcer (in an interview from Sidney, right after Ringo got his tonsils out and rejoined the band in Australia) ~ "Any minute now the Beatles will appear. Wait a minute. Here comes the Beatles! You can't hear them, over the screech of the crowd. This is what they've been waiting for! "
John ~ "Hey!"
SCREAMS
John ~ "How are you?"
SCREAMS
George ~ "There's a camera!"
SCREAMS
John ~ "We love you."
SCREAMS
Announcer ~ "Well, you've just seen the Beatles. The crowds are subdued now and safely on their way home."

Question ~ "It's very brave to bring us the original Ringo Starr."
Paul ~ "Very brave, so brave."
John (to Ringo) ~ "I've seen your dad on TV, you know."
Ringo ~ "Oh yeah? What was he doing?"

Question ~ "Are you still ill?"
Ringo ~ "I'm better now."

Question ~ "I hear you had quite a reception when you came in to Melbourne. "
John ~ "It's as wild as Adelaide. I think that makes them equal. That's about the wildest one we've ever seen."
Paul ~ "I think Australia's pretty wild all around."

Question ~ "Were you worried about what you saw?"
Paul ~ "We get worried when it stops, you know."

Question ~ "John, didn't you bring some of your family over here with you?"
John ~ "My auntie and she's in New Zealand. Yes, that's why she came. She's got relatives there that's related to her. She came back here to get fresh air."

Question ~ "There's so much noise at your shows, are you miming your songs?"
John ~ "Wouldn't that be cheating?"

Question ~ "Do you enjoy press conferences?"
John ~ "Yes, depending on the intelligence of the questions."

Other Quotes

George ~ "It's all in the mind, ya know."

Paul ~ "Plastic Soul, Man. Plastic Soul."

John ~ "Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink. I needn't argue about that, I'm right and I will be proved right. We're more popular than Jesus Christ now. I don't know which will go first, rock 'n roll or Christianity. Jesus was all right, but his desciples were thick and ordinary. It's them twisting it that ruins it for me."

Paul ~ "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

John ~ "Listen to the color of your dreams."

John ~ "All you need is love."

Paul ~ "The hardest act to follow is yourself."

John ~ "We were just a band, that made it very, very big that's all."

John ~ "For the next number, I'd like to ask your help. The people in the cheap seats clap your hands, and the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry."

George ~ "When you've seen beyond yourself - then you may find peace of mind is waiting there."

John ~ "Imagine all the people living life in peace."

Ringo ~ "Tomorrow Never Knows."

Paul ~ "Someone from the office rang me up and said, 'Look, Paul, you're dead.' And I said, 'Oh, I don't agree with that.'"

John ~ "Reality leaves a lot to the imagination."

Ringo ~ "I'd like to be sort of comfortable, with a nice house and a few hair dressing businesses. That's a good game."

John ~ "My defenses were so great. The cocky rock-and-roll hero who knew all the answers was actually a terrified guy who didn't know how to cry. Simple."

John, after he wrote I am the walrus he said to Pete Shotton ~ "Let the fuckers try and work that one out, Pete!"

Ringo ~ "It's been a hard day's night that was!"

George ~ "Show me that I'm everywhere and get me home for tea."

Paul ~ "Band on the run."

John ~ "Love is a promise,
Love is a souvenir,
Once given never forgotten,
Never let it disappear."

John, at dinner held in his honor for In His Own Write ~ "Thank you. You have a lucky face."

Ringo ~ "The future will never come, it will all soon be over tomorrow."

John ~ "Here's another clue for you all. The walrus was Paul."

John ~ "Her and I are like the wind, you can't see us coming: But when we come through, the trees bend."

John ~ "Happiness is a warm gun."

George ~ "All the world, is birthday cake, so take a piece but not too much."

John ~ "Living is easy with eyes closed... Misunderstanding all you see... It's getting hard to be some one but it's all wrong... It doesn't matter much to me..."

John ~ "I don't intend to be a performing flea anymore. I was the dreamweaver, but although I'll be around I don't intend to be running at 20,000 miles an hour, trying to prove myself. I don't want to die at 40."

John ~ "When I was about 12, I used to think I must be a genuis, but nobody's noticed. If there is such a thing as a genuis, I am one, and if there isn't, I don't care.

Paul ~ "I realise now that taking drugs was like taking an asprin without having a headache."

George, to George Martin ~ "Well, I don't like your tie for a start."

Ringo, on Paul's "Death" ~ "I'm not going to say anything because nobody believes me when I do."

Ringo, after arriving in the US for the first time ~ "So this is America. They all seem out of their minds."

George ~ "American girls seem to have these massive bottoms."